If you know what it feels like to be bullied, things like resiliency, self-compassion, and developing trust aren’t words you would use to describe yourself at the time, most likely. From my own personal experience, I can tell you that I would never have looked at myself and use words even close to that. If anything, “victim, sadness, frustration, worthless, and hopeless” better suited me during the worst times of my experiencing with being bullied.
If we’re being real here, it wasn’t just during the darkest times but rather those feeling permeated my entire being all the time. It’s how I saw myself when I looked in the mirror, even on the good days. That’s what bullying does, it takes over your entire existence and you feel like you are what others have labeled you, you are what they have done to you, and who are you to think otherwise. Especially as a young child or teenager, your experience in this world and your view of it is largely determined by your home life and the events that happen to you.
So if you’re constantly on the defensive, and being the victim of senseless acts of cruelty, it takes a toll which can carry over well into adulthood.
I’ve talked about this subject on previous podcast episodes and with guest bloggers over on Surviving My Past, and I now have the opportunity again to explore the effects of bullying and how we can overcome that trauma and work towards being the person we want to be, not the person we think we can only ever be.
My guest, Melissa Wilson, is a survivor of bullying and is now a Certified Coach, working with clients who have experienced bullying, and other forms of abuse and childhood trauma to help them get unstuck and move forward toward their goals and dreams. She is also a podcast host of, “The Grass Gets Greener Podcast” where she talks with survivors, professionals, and everyday people who have a story to share and ways to help inspire you to not give up even in the wake of a traumatic past.
I had the pleasure of being on Melissa’s podcast a few months back, where I shared some of my survivor story of childhood sexual abuse and bullying, and how I’ve been able to work through those experiences. I hope you’ll consider checking it out and sharing it with someone who might benefit from it.
The Grass Gets Greener represents hope and optimism. Sometimes you may feel as if other people have a better life than you, that the grass is greener on their side of the fence, so to speak. Well, this site is here to provide you with inspiration and support to help you overcome the effects of what you experienced that can make you feel this way. This site is here to help you become the person you are meant to be. To show you how the grass gets greener for you!
During our chat together, Melissa shares the experiences of bullying that she endured and how it affected her life:
- How and when the bullying began for her in school, when she was the new kid and experienced both physical and emotional abuse from classmates.
- She shares how the teachers in her school did nothing to stop it, and this helped fuel the fear of reaching out for help from her parents, due to fear of making the situation even worse. Her silence was the only thing she could control.
- Five years after the bullying stopped, she was finally able to tell her parents, receive the support she needed, and start to pick up the pieces.
- You’ll learn how those experiences she endured help fuel her to learn more about herself, study Psychology, and how the effects of being bullied last well into adulthood.
- The importance of reaching out and telling someone when you need help, and how staying silent keeps you stuck and perpetuates the idea that you do not deserve help.
- We discuss the skills that Melissa developed to aid in her healing journey, and how even though she still struggles at times with the after effects, life is so much better because of putting in the hard work of education and healing.
Be sure and check out Melissa’s Podcast, The Grass Gets Greener, over on her website, and available wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts. If you’re interested in working with Melissa Wilson as your coach, drop her a line, she’d love to hear from you.
Please consider sharing this post and podcast with someone who might need it, and don’t forget to subscribe on your favorite podcasting app.
All conversation and information exchanged during participation on the Beyond Your Past Podcast, on BeyondYourPast.com, and BeyondYourPastRadio.com is intended for educational and informational purposes only. Nothing on these podcasts or posted on the above-mentioned websites are supplements for or supersedes the relationship and direction of your medical or mental health providers.